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 Post subject: More Mondegreens
Unread postPosted: Sun Dec 12, 2004 12:04 am 
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Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2003 10:52 am
Posts: 10177
Catholic elementary school children were asked questions about the Old and New Testaments. These have not been retouched or corrected for spelling. I thought some of them were hilarious.

1. In the first book of the bible, Guinness, God got tired of creating the world, sohe took the Sabbath off.

2. Adam and Eve were created froman apple tree.

3. Noah's wife was called Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark which the animals come on in pears.
4. Lots wife was a pillar of salt by day but a ball of fire by night.

5.Samson was a strongman who leg himself be led astray by a Jezelbel like Delilah.

6.Samson slayed the Philistines withthe axe of the Apostles.

7.Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread whichis bread, without any ingredients.

8. the first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

9. the seventh commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

10.moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.

11.The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.

12.David wa a Hebrew king skilled atplaying the liar. He fought with the Finklesteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times.

13.Solomon, one of David's sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

14.When Mary heard that she was themogher of Jesus, she sang the Magna Carta.

15. When the three wise guys from the East Side arrived, they found Jesus with the manager.

16.Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

17.Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do one to others before they do one to you.

18.It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.

19. The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 decibels.

20.The epistles were the wives of the apostles.

21. St. Paul cavorted to Christianity. He preached holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage.

22 Christians have only one spouse this is called monotony.

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